There Are No Words

After listening to the heartache of someone who has been visited by death more often and in so short a time than anybody should ever have to endure, I was compelled to find words of comfort, but found none. Hopefully the giving of myself will be able to lift her spirit even a little.


There Are No Words

All through the night,
I searched in vain
for just the right words
to ease your pain.

As night became day,
My mind still blank,
Any hopes that I had
Eventually sank.

Finally it hit me,
No words could convey
The loss that you suffered
In the harshest of ways.

Instead join my tears
With those you have cried
For all of your loved ones
Whom to early have died.

Allow me some heartache
You feel deep inside,
Knowing I'm with you,
Aware that I've tried.

Give me your sadness
To help lighten the load,
As you travel without them
Life's tumultuous road.

Extend your hand,
And I'll tightly grab hold
To walk right beside you
When you're empty and cold.

Any strength and courage
You find missing today,
Take all that you need,
Glad to give it away.

If there's ever a time
You decide not to fight,
Remember I'm with you
To move towards the light.

We both know the truth
That closure's a lie,
Our hearts remain broken
When love ones have died.

Yet being together
With no words to say,
I think is more helpful
Than going our way...alone.

There are no words.

Blessings and Peace, dear child. my love is all I have to give.

Oh, So Weary

I was ten years old when my family got our first television set. My brother and I were playing catch in the backyard. My mother yelled out the window for us to come in, she had a big surprise for us. As we entered the living room, sitting in the far corner was a huge piece of furniture with a very tiny screen smack dab in the middle of it! And so our love affair with watching T.V. began.

In its infancy, television broadcasting was extremely limited.  If I remember correctly, shows were available only a few hours a day, the rest of the time a test pattern symbol accompanied by an annoying noise was the only choice we had.

From the moment Katilius delivered it, every evening after dinner and baths, we gathered around the television to watch the news and 'a few wholesome shows like 'Howdy Doody' and 'Sky King.'
Saturdays were special because at 7:00 wrestling was on.  Oh how my Baba loved wrestling! She'd cheer loudly for her favorites and boo the ones that, in her opinion, were playing dirty.

For many years, the only violence produced and viewed then was wrestling. Fast-forward to 2018, turn on the T.V. at any time on any day, and all you see is violence! Literally every show, even cartoons, is infiltrated with whacks, smacks, and cruelty. Fighting, bullying, cursing and worse are what lures us to watch. Take that stuff out, and the show in question will suffer miserable ratings and be canceled in the blink of an eye. And let's be honest here, we are all guilty of tuning into programs that scare and offend our sensibilities.

Perhaps the most violent television broadcasting today isn't the weekly shows though, but the daily news. In the beginning, the purpose of the news was to inform and alert, and sometimes even to uplift. Only 15 minutes was allotted for said programming twice daily during the week. I really don't ever remember watching the news on the weekends. Now television networks schedule news programs anywhere from 30 to 90 minutes at a clip, and vie for the bragging rights to present the most recent and most horrific events of the day. "You heard it here first," is commonly expressed so casual viewers will become regulars.

The content of today's news is a constant reporting of shootings, stabbings, killings, drug seller take-downs, cases of domestic and sexual abuse, political bad-mouthing, fraud, and the list goes on and on! Rarely, if ever, is something wholesome presented. After all, who wants to watch good when evil is so much more exciting, right? And because of  the major channels' time extensions, these tragedies are repeated over and over again so that eventually we become numb to the violent world we now live in. When a shooting occurs, we don't flinch, but ask if the victim lived or died. When a child goes missing, we simply assume a family member was responsible and move on, and if a house fire is reported, we wonder if arson was the cause.

It's gotten to the point that I watch the news at noon and skip the rest of the broadcasts. I am so weary of what T.V. stations deem as 'news worthy,' oh, so weary!

GLORIOUS SWITZERLAND IN REVUE!

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. I couldn't agree more!

I could add 500 more, but I think you get the picture! Glorious Switzerland! More to come later!

I AM EVAPORATING

This poem is a take on my journey towards self-actualization. Only when we become less of what holds us back, keeps us down, limits forward gain, can we become more of who we were meant to be, one with the immensely infinite  universe. Appreciate comments so I can improve both as a writer and a person. Blessings and Peace, love ya'll

I AM EVAPORATING

by Flo Barnett

I am evaporating,

Vanishing into thin air.

Particle by Particle,

There is less of me today.

I am evaporating,

Vanishing into thin air.

Little by little by little,

Disappearing!

There is no pain, no suffering

I’ve not shed a single tear,

I’m not afraid to fade away,

No angst, no dread, no fear.

Evaporating

IS

Oddly exhilarating,

Excitingly sensual,

Completely freeing!

I am evaporating,

Vanishing into thin air.

Being breathed in by the living, 

Becoming one with every existence.

 Oddly exhilarating!

Seeing the world in technicolor,

Hearing the call of the wild,

Tasting the lips of hungry lovers, 

Frolicking to rhythms of diversity.

Excitedly sensual!

I am evaporating,

Vanishing into thin air,

Integrating with thousands of waiting hearts,

Millions of generous souls,

Billions of shining stars, and...

One immensely infinite universe!

I am evaporating,

Vanishing into thin air

Only to be absolutely me.

Completely freeing!

WHAT MUST HAPPEN NOW?

Report details sexual abuse by more than 300 priests in Pennsylvania's Catholic Church by Daniel Burke and Susannah Cullinine

(CNN)A new grand jury report says that internal documents from six Catholic dioceses in Pennsylvania show that more than 300 "predator priests" have been credibly accused of sexually abusing more than 1,000 child victims."We believe that the real number of children whose records were lost or who were afraid ever to come forward is in the thousands," the grand jury report says."Priests were raping little boys and girls, and the men of God who were responsible for them not only did nothing; they hid it all. For decades. Monsignors, auxiliary bishops, bishops, archbishops, cardinals have mostly been protected; many, including some named in this report, have been promoted."The grand jury described the church's methods as "a playbook for concealing the truth" after FBI agents identified a series of practices they found in diocese files.The lengthy report, released Tuesday afternoon, investigates clergy sexual abuse dating to 1947 in six dioceses: Allentown, Erie, Greensburg, Harrisburg, Pittsburgh and Scranton. Pennsylvania's two other dioceses, Philadelphia and Altoona-Johnstown, have been the subjects of earlier grand jury reports, which found similarly damaging information about clergy and bishops in those dioceses.

"There have been other reports about child sex abuse within the Catholic Church. But never on this scale," the grand jurors wrote in Tuesday's report. "For many of us, those earlier stories happened someplace else, someplace away. Now we know the truth: it happened everywhere."The grand jurors said that "almost every instance of abuse we found is too old to be prosecuted." But charges have been filed against two priests, one in Erie diocese and another in Greensburg diocese, who have been accused of abusing minors.

"We learned of these abusers directly from their dioceses -- which we hope is a sign that the church is finally changing its ways," the grand jurors said. "And there may be more indictments in the future; investigation continues."At a news conference announcing the report's release, Pennsylvania Attorney General Josh Shapiro called it the "largest, most comprehensive report into child sexual abuse within the Catholic Church ever produced in the United States."

So what must happen now? Now that this report has been aired, publicized, read, rebuked, and denied, what will be the outcome? Once the outrage and shock has lessened and the general public moves on to the next horrific breaking news story, will the Catholic Church go back to business as usual? According to Bishop Malesic of Greensburg, and Bishop Zubik of Pittsburgh, change has been in the works since 2002, and the Church of Today is nothing like the Church of the Past.

But how is that possible? According to the now infamous report, the sexual abuse of children by priests and the cover-up and reassignment of their abusers by bishops whose sole purpose was to protect the reputation of the Church dates back to 1947.  That's almost 70 years! And if my math is correct, the Church of Today has only been in existence for 16 years!

Sorry folks, but the horrendous actions of the clergy that have been going on for seven decades cannot be suddenly transformed in so short a span of time, if ever. I am a Catholic and always will be a Catholic. I realize full well that Christ's Church is governed by men, human beings with the many flaws that go along with being human. And it is precisely for this very reason that true change will take at least as many decades to occur under a knowledgeable leadership willing to put their members, especially the young, first, even if it means exposing the sins of the institution. From the top down, the Pope, cardinals, bishops, priest, deacon, and seminarians must be schooled in what constitutes sexual abuse, what necessary actions must be taken to deal with any and all abusers no matter their rank or stature, how to identify potential abusers and how to stop them before ruining the lives of children, their families, and the church community, and most importantly, how to heal the deep wounds of the victims of the past, present, and sadly, those yet to be victimized.

Laws must be changed or put in place immediately to severely punish not only the abusers but those who choose to turn away from the abuse as well. Using children to satisfy sexual urges is a crime and must be dealt with in the same manner as any other purposeful felony. Yes, these men are in need of rehabilitation, but imprisonment is where that rehab should occur. Unfortunately in our society, there is yet no known practices that ensure efficient and permanent change. As my Baba would say, "Lock em up and throw away the key!" Though this statement might seem harsh to some, I'm certain those who have been abused would agree wholehearted!

THAT IS WHAT MUST HAPPEN NOW! Over time, my hope is that the Church of the Past will be totally eradicated and the Church of Today will become a reality!

Blessings and Peace!

In Need of Therapy?

The answer should be a resounding, YES! WE ALL DO!

Many years ago I was plagued with a serious physical malady that stumped at least three medical doctors. After the first one admitted me to the hospital for an extensive study, he concluded I had a rare form of MS and gave me six months to live! That was thirty-four years ago, so he clearly was way off the mark! The second one gave me a shot of some kind and told me I'd return to health in due time. If I'd listened to him, I'd still be waiting for relief! The third one checked me over and bluntly told me she didn't have a clue! I respected her the most since she was at least honest about her inability to treat my condition.

Finally I saw a neurosurgeon. After he conducted a series of tests, he concluded I had 'empty nest syndrome' and needed to see his friend, a psychologist. At first I was leery, but decided to give it a try since I had nothing to lose at that point.

I was in therapy for almost two years, and I can honestly say that those sessions literally saved my sanity and my life. I had no idea how much junk I'd buried deep inside me, allowing it to eat away at my very soul. The first visits were awkward, made me angry, left me questioning why I agreed to this 'silly psychobabble' in the first place.

As time went on though, with the expert guidance of my therapist, I began to actually feel better, physically and mentally. Along with talk therapy, I underwent hypnosis and biofeedback, and little by little my symptoms began to subside. Eventually my aliment was given a name, and I was able to do research on its causes and percentage of cure.  I discovered stress could be a contributing factor and although remission was highly likely, if triggered, the problem could surface again.

Once both my therapist and I agreed that sessions were no longer needed, I returned to living my life, healthy and able to conquer the world!

I learned so much about myself in therapy that I would have never realized on my own. Yes, I went to find a cure for a strange malady that confounded three physicians, but I came away with a new outlook on my past, present, and future. I was able to understand and forgive myself as well as others for the perceived wrongs I'd carried around for so long. I walked around feeling light and carefree.

I also found out that when psychology students decide to become therapists, they engage in extensive therapy themselves. Not only do they learn how to conduct sessions, but more importantly, they discover personal issues they need to deal with before ever trying to help potential clients.

When I retired in 2000, the symptoms connected with my physical malady slowly began to resurface. I immediately found a therapist and began going to weekly sessions again. Amazingly more issues were unearthed and dealt with, and in less than 4 months my symptoms disappeared.

True, initially I sought therapy because of a debilitating problem, but the transformation that I underwent was astounding! I became an open-minded person with an amazing understanding of the human condition; I realized people didn't purposely set out to do me harm, but could only act according to what they knew at the time. I finally could forgive those perceived wrongs that burdened me for so long, and I actually developed empathy for folks I once held in rebuke.

Therapy is such a freeing experience. Give yourselves this gift that will keep on giving!

In need of therapy? WE ALL DO!

Blessings and Peace!

A Child's Greatest Gift

'Behind every strong and independent woman 

lies a broken little girl who had to learn 

to get back up and never depend 

on anyone. Amen!' Timeless Reminders

First thing this morning, when coming across this particular fb post, I began reflecting on how strong and independent my three children have grown up to be. Although I can't really say any of them had the misfortune of suffering a major trauma or event in childhood that would have left them broken, I believe I can pinpoint why they are so self-reliant.

You see, I am the embodiment of this post. If I hadn't been that broken little girl so early on in life, I might not have become the strong, independent woman I am today. However, if truth be told, I would have given up this strength and independence in a minute to have never      been so shattered! But I do know I would have learned to be strong and independent            from the very person whose untimely departure was responsible for my ability to navigate through life without relying on anyone.

From the moment I gave birth, I was consciously determined to raise all my children to be independent. I believed it was my parental duty to foster this one attribute more than any other simply because independence paves the way for success in life. From the age of three or four, my children were responsible for getting their own breakfast, choosing what clothes to wear, and deciding what to do with their free time once they'd completed their daily chores. When they turned school age, they packed their own lunches until they decided it was a pain in the butt and began eating in the cafeteria.

You might think I was the type of mother who stayed in bed till noon, leaving my kids to fend for themselves while I indulged in my own selfishness, but you'd be wrong. I was always up at the crack of dawn, awaiting each little face to appear around the corner, to greet me with a sleepy smile and a whispered, 'good morning.' I watched them as they climbed up on the counter to fetch the cereal box of choice, grab a bowl, and pour the milk. As you might imagine, on more than one occasion, milk was spilled all over the place before it ever made it into the bowl. After cleaning up the mess, the child in question would eat breakfast, get dressed, make his or her bed, watch some television, and when in school, walked out the door unassisted. 

I don't think any of the three ever realized how proud these early signs of independence made me. If they could accomplish these tasks without my help, I knew they'd do fine when the difficult challenges, disappointments, and trials presented themselves later on in life. And, I can honestly say that in adulthood they've been able to see the light at the end of the tunnel without depending on any one, which leaves me very satisfied that the one attribute I was determined to foster in each of them is the greatest gift they ever received from me!

Amen!